An Open Letter to Joy Behar (yes, fucking Joy Behar, one of the bitches on that goddamn awful all-female talkfest The View that no one gives a shit about until one of the harpies screams something that people can self-indulgently write about) **
I guess Joy Behar said something negative about some chick using “nursing” as her talent in the Miss America show.
It doesn’t even matter if I agree with the topic of these open letters anymore, I just want to be fucking done with all of them. How about just call it an “opinion piece” or a “persuasive essay”? In fact, why do these things need to be called anything at all? Why not just write something, give it a title, and call it good? In fact, I’m kind of writing an open letter right now–an open letter to open letter writers–but I’m not such an asshole that I need to title it that way.
I think you call it an “open letter” just so you can be as bitchy as possible. (No, this isn’t another one of my female rants because I equally hate open letters written by men–perhaps more so.) It’s such a narcissistic way to write; that you’re so important and insightful that everyone would be interested to hear your conversation with someone far more famous than you. It’s very lazy writing, too. The whole tone of every open letter I’ve ever read is so fucking self-righteous, sniveling, and crybaby that they reek like those goddamn internet memes that people repost with captions like, “you tell ’em!” or preach!” or “this^^^”.
I’m not sure what Joy Behar said and I don’t really care, but if she said that nursing isn’t a real talent she’s right. It’s a profession and you have job skills. Maybe you’re “talented” at your job skills but that’s kind of hard to distinguish from just being not fire-able. Why don’t all the waitresses in the group walk around with a tray? What an idea. Let’s just showcase what we do for a living, won’t that be fun? The realtors can show a house. The lawyers can write a few briefs. The I-Bankers can snort blow and suck up to senior management. And the pharma reps can have sex with a doctor.
I said earlier this wasn’t a female rant so let me do that real quick: is there anyone more eager to pat herself on the back for just being competent at a job than your average woman?
P.S. Hypothetical: would you want this chick as your nurse? She’s pretty annoying but she’s also super hot. As a man, you have to know where your talents with women lie how to put yourself in the best situation to succeed. Me being laid up in a hospital bed is not doing me any favors unless I’m there because I jumped in front of a bus for someone (yeah right). And since she’s probably more annoying than hot, I’m going with no, I’d rather not have her as my nurse.
** And no, I didn’t fucking read it. And I also didn’t fucking watch that video I posted.